todays lesson: dont take school too seriously.
today i taught math. it was so lame. it was kind of sad because i had no idea what the eff the kids were doing, so i couldnt help out. i just pretended like i did know, but wanted them to figure it out by themselves by reading the chapter again. i think they bought it. but thats not the lesson of today. todays lesson is to not take school, or life for that matter, too seriously. in other words, have a sense of humor.
7th period, last class of the day. naturally, the kids are all excited to go home and are very talkative and energetic. i didnt have a problem with this at all. i too was anxious to go home and was just as talkative as the students. they would joke around with me and i with them. of course, it got a little noisy. no big deal.
the door opens and in walks a student holing a paper for the regular teacher. when i told her that the teacher was ill, she turned to leave. being as quick witted as i am, i decided i would conspire with this girl to play a trick on my pupils. i asked her to tell the class that a teacher form down the hall sent her to tell them they were too noisy. the girl repeated what i had asked her. i then added "i guess i'll have to report this to your teacher, right? right??" and instead of hearing an "oh, mr. johnson, you are so clever! i want to be just like you when i am older!" the room fell silent. expressions of fear and absolute terror covered the once vibrant glow of youth preparing to end a school day. instead of songs of praise and admiration for a joke well played, i heard "please dont write a bad report, mr. johnson" and "we're sorry, mr. johnson. dont tell mr. ____"
i didnt know what to do. i told them not to worry. i would be merciful and overlook their most heinous of sins on that occasion, still not understanding how they didnt see me tell that girl to say what she did...
Friday, February 2, 2007
Tuesday, January 16, 2007
ESL/American History
today's lesson: cheaters never prosper
today i taught esl (english as a second language) and american history. the assignment had a theme that corresponded with yesterday's holiday, martin luther king day. as a class, we went to the computer lab and the students were to research dr. martin luther king jr. and answer some questions about the man and the civil rights movement. naturally, the worksheet for the esl class was significantly easier to understand and find the answers. it involved questions such as "when and where was marting luther king born" and "what did rosa parks do and in what city" and things like that. despite the simple nature of the questions, many of the students decided that they would cheat, and copy off of other students in the class. there were about 10 students who did so. and despite their best efforts to keep it top secret by speaking in their native tongue, little did they know that many of their native words like "copiar" (copy) and "mas rapido" (faster) correspond very closely to words in portuguese, in which i am fluent. i knew exactly what was going on, and was excited to see what their results were.
they managed to get the birthdate and place of martin luther king, but after that it was all down hill.
rosa parks was famous for being the "mother of modern" which occured in "michighan"
when asked to cite three lines from the i have a dream speach, they all wrote "it was good because it was for freedom" (i was unable to locate this phrase anywhere in the speech)
and when asked why he was important, they all wrote the same response, word for word.
now, you may be thinking to yourselves, "leave them alone, jerk. they are learning a new language"... not so. this was the advanced class, which means they simply live in a bi lingual home, and are fluent in both spanish and english. also, wikipidia is available in spanish.
needless to say, they did not do very well on the assignment. and one wandered into a later class, and tried to give all the answers to another student. to which i responded "no es michighan"
today i taught esl (english as a second language) and american history. the assignment had a theme that corresponded with yesterday's holiday, martin luther king day. as a class, we went to the computer lab and the students were to research dr. martin luther king jr. and answer some questions about the man and the civil rights movement. naturally, the worksheet for the esl class was significantly easier to understand and find the answers. it involved questions such as "when and where was marting luther king born" and "what did rosa parks do and in what city" and things like that. despite the simple nature of the questions, many of the students decided that they would cheat, and copy off of other students in the class. there were about 10 students who did so. and despite their best efforts to keep it top secret by speaking in their native tongue, little did they know that many of their native words like "copiar" (copy) and "mas rapido" (faster) correspond very closely to words in portuguese, in which i am fluent. i knew exactly what was going on, and was excited to see what their results were.
they managed to get the birthdate and place of martin luther king, but after that it was all down hill.
rosa parks was famous for being the "mother of modern" which occured in "michighan"
when asked to cite three lines from the i have a dream speach, they all wrote "it was good because it was for freedom" (i was unable to locate this phrase anywhere in the speech)
and when asked why he was important, they all wrote the same response, word for word.
now, you may be thinking to yourselves, "leave them alone, jerk. they are learning a new language"... not so. this was the advanced class, which means they simply live in a bi lingual home, and are fluent in both spanish and english. also, wikipidia is available in spanish.
needless to say, they did not do very well on the assignment. and one wandered into a later class, and tried to give all the answers to another student. to which i responded "no es michighan"
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